Why are men often advised to change their entire personalities, hobbies, and passions under the guise of “self improvement”

The advice isn’t to become someone else, it’s to become a better version of yourself.

Would you rather date a nice girl who was working to improve her career, working out or doing sport to keep fit and doing hobbies she enjoyed.

Or you would rather date a similarly nice girl, but she’s lazy, content to just barely do enough in her life, is slowly getting overweight and sits around complaining about being single because nobody can appreciate her for who she is.

Obviously some people would pick #2, but mostly its just them seeing their own lack or ambition and low self esteem reflected in the other. The more productive and interesting people will gravitate towards each other.

Dont be surprised if the only people interested in you are the dregs if you cant even come to terms with the fact that you are their equal in the opposite gender.

So no, dont change your personality or hobbies. Just shown some passion, ambition and at a bare minimum look after yourself as best you can.

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