I Think I Accidentally Discovered the Key to Tinder: Exclamation Points!

Alright, my goal here is to be as non-clickbait-y as possible, so I’m gonna divide this into CONTEXT and ADVICE.

CONTEXT: I’ve been on dating apps largely unsuccessfully for…maybe 4 years? (at varying levels of interest and effort, in all fairness). The greatest frustration I had was always matching with a girl, sending the first message, then never getting a response. This frustration was amplified by the fact that while I’m neither a stud nor a comedian, I’m generally a fairly attractive and reasonably funny guy (24M at the time of this post). About a month ago I deleted Tinder, hoping that a different app with a different reputation would work out better. The thing is, it did! I got a handful of matches, and my first date from online in quite a while, but this story isn’t about that. At first I though it might have been the change in apps, but when I analyzed how I was communicating, I realized that I had changed two thing: on the new app (Hinge for anyone curious), I was excited to talk to new people, and critically I was messaging like I was excited to meet new people. I noticed that there appeared to be far fewer people on Hinge in my area, so a little less than a week ago, I re-downloaded Tinder and created a new account. The rest of the story belongs in the ADVICE section, so here we go…

ADVICE: After downloading Tinder and creating a fresh new account, I decided to make a concerted effort to be excited when messaging new matches (easier for fellow extroverts, but hey, fake it until you make it). The difference was night and day. I’ve received maybe 25% more matches than when I was active previously, which is probably a combination of making my profile a bit punchier (flirty) with a lot more personality, and whatever shenanigans the Tinder algorithm uses to match new accounts. The change that prompted me to make this post are the responses. Literally the difference between “Hello.” and “Hello!” has taken me from +50% non-responsive matches to what has so far been a 100% response rate. It’s getting difficult to keep up with all the conversations in between doing my day-to-day life stuff. Now, a disclaimer, not all of the responses have been good, and not all the conversations have been fruitful, but the chances of achieving whatever goals you have on Tinder get a lot higher when you can break the conversation barrier much more consistently.

TLDR: Be excited! Use exclamation points!

Latest posts