I don’t know who needs to hear this but… if you’re always thinking of them, and they’re always thinking of them, who’s thinking of you??

First girl I ever dated was like this. She led me on for months just to ghost me forever at the end of it. It was a vicious cycle of her saying she cared about me, we’d go on a date, and then I wouldn’t hear from her for days/weeks after. It took everything I had to block her number after that. It’s been a year and a half and I still think of her sometimes.

When I was dating this girl, it was almost as if I ‘needed’ to feel that reciprocation from her. I clung to the idea of a relationship with this girl. It took me longer than it should have to realize exactly this post; that I was thinking about her and she was thinking about herself. She had manipulated me for so long and absolutely broke my heart at the end of it all. I was a wreck for months afterwards.

If I gained anything though, it’s that I’m not afraid to be alone anymore as hard as it is sometimes. I have lonely nights, but I find that I’m better able to maintain an overall positive outlook on things. I still have a long way to go with meeting/dating women, but I’m on the right track.

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